32-year-old sister hires 28-year-old brother as her wedding photographer, only to refuse to pay for his work and demands the photos as a wedding present: ‘I'm deleting them if you don't pay me’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Jun 3, 2025 5:00 PM EDT

In a normal and well-functioning family, when one family member asks for the services of another, here is how the conversation should usually go:

"Hi, parent/sibling/cousin/uncle! I know you do (insert job description here) for a living, and I would love to hire your services for a future event I am hosting".

"No problem! And since you are such a close family member, I am even willing to give you a massive discount for my services".

"Oh, no, I would actually prefer to pay you the full amount, because I care about you and want you to be fairly paid for the hard work I know you will put in for me".

"Sounds good, I will absolutely do my best for you".

In a less functioning family, there are many ways in which this conversation can go very wrong. When family members do not respect each other and do not see each other's worth, they can lose sight of what's really important, and that can lead to really awkward situations. Just like what happened between the siblings in the story below.

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  • When this sister asked her brother to be her wedding photographer, she actually expected him to offer his services for free, as a wedding gift. The brother did not appreciate his sister's entitled attitude and told her she would only get a discount.

    However, when the time to pay had come, the sister refused to give her brother the money he had worked for, and he, in return, refused to give her the wedding photos.

    Keep scrolling to read the rest of the story.

  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10512945664
    via pixelshot

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    AITAH for refusing to give my sister her wedding photos unless she pays me what I'm worth?

    So I (28M) am a professional photographer. I've been doing weddings for years, have my own studio, and I'm d In good at what I do. My sister (32F) just got married,
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 03
    and months ago she asked me to shoot her wedding. I said sure, assuming we'd be doing it like any other client -―with a contract and a payment plan.
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 04
    She was shocked and said she thought I'd do it "as a gift." I laughed and said, "My gift is giving you a discount." She pouted, mom guilted me, but I stood firm and
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 05
    charged her HALF my usual rate still thousands less than she would've paid elsewhere. Wedding happens, I k | it. Gorgeous shots. Everyone's
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 06
    thrilled. Now it's a week later, I send her watermarked previews and ask for the rest of the payment before I release the full gallery.
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 07
    She loses it. Says I'm "money hungry," says "family shouldn't treat each other like clients," and that I'm holding her memories hostage. She tries to get our
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 08
    mom involved, who calls me "heartless" and "selfish." So here's the kicker: I told her if she doesn't pay by the end of the month, I'm deleting the photos. She can
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 09
    hire someone else to recreate the day with iPhone selfies if she wants. Edit pasted from a reply that I made, for clarity:
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 10
    Yeah, after thinking about it, I'm not going to delete the photos. I decided that in the moment when I was frustrated, and I think that was a step too far.
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 11
    Cheezburger Image 10512967936
    via Volodymyr Shtun

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 12
    bang_bang_moneytree Give them one photo every birthday and Christmas.... you'll never have to buy a gift for the rest of your life
    via bang_bang_moneytree
  • 13
    Maleficent-Aerie7384 That's why OP should not move a step from the boundary he set, but without going too far. Pictures are going to sleep for a while if she go that way and that's fine, everything was told
    via Maleficent-Aerie7384
  • 14
    before At the end staying fair but refusing her petty game is the best and will avoid him a lot of issue as doing something bad.
    via Maleficent-Aerie7384
  • 15
    This-Bandicoot-5731 OP Yeah, after thinking about it, I'm not going to delete the photos. I decided that in the moment when I was frustrated, and I think that was a step too far.
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 16
    Maleficent-Aerie 7384 It's really annoying to get this kind of pressure from family, but you are right to stand up for yourself, good luck.
    via Maleficent-Aerie7384
  • 17
    stefaniki YTA for not setting expectations at the moment she asked. You assumed she'd pay you.
    via stefaniki
  • 18
    This-Bandicoot-5731 OP Yes, I did indeed assume that I would be compensated for my professional service.
    via This-Bandicoot-5731
  • 19
    turtleofdoomm NTA. But if she already paid half, so only give her half of the photos or give all but downsize to 800x600 where she can upload it on FB but theres no way she can print them out without it looking like sh
    via turtleofdoomm
  • 20
    UnluckyCountry2784 NTA. Your sister planned to guilt trip you after everything is done. Stand your ground OP.
    via UnluckyCountry2784
  • 21
    kenswiz You're NTA. You set a boundary and you're exchanging a professional service for half price. Just because someone is family doesn't mean you're not allowed to set boundaries and expectations for your time.
    via kenswiz
  • 22
    Thefluffyowl5207418 It's weird...in my reality I wouldn't want to charge my sister but she'd insist on paying me. I don't think you're TA though, she agreed to have you take the pics after you
    via Thefluffyowl5207418
  • 23
    expected to be compensated for it. I guess this is why most people don't like to mix business w/family or loved ones
    via Thefluffyowl5207418

Tags

family drama aita bride drama brother mother work photos reddit story petty wedding family sister Reddit money parents photographer
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